How To Attract A HypnoDomme: Part One - Why This Series?

I saw a post on a hypnosis website and it made me pause. It was similar to one I've seen a hundred times before, probably more than that, which is why I don't name the site or the poster. It was similar to any number of instant messages and private mails I've received on various sites. It made me sigh, because I worry that its writer will never find what zie seeks in the world of erotic hypnosis. I've seen it in regular D/s groups too, but since I do EH I'm going to confine myself to commenting on this aspect alone.

The post was by a male, and it said simply "Seeking Female hypnotist to program me to be a slave."

A Domme had responded in a way I myself have so many times. She was polite and concise. She simply asked "What do you have to offer a Domme?"

This is a legitimate question. Whether it's fair or not, the fact is that there are more cis het males seeking hypnosis on either side of the watch than cis het (and MANY more than cis bi!) women to partner them. If you completely exclude trans women as viable partners, as many of these men do, the pool gets smaller still. If I had one hundred hours in the day, I still couldn't hypnotize everyone I wish I could. I can deplore the reality of it all day long, but it is how it is. (I do my best to change it by being open to females who are interested and encouraging them, but at the end of the day the imbalance remains.)

The original poster responded to the Domme with the following sentence, verbatim: "ill surrender completely and be ur slave"

That's it. Nothing else. And it made me depressed for him, because I don't think he gets it.

Although I am a pro, I am going to take money and professional Dommes out of the equation in this series of posts. I can still easily speak to the lifestyle aspect of things, as my Chosen and pets know. But of the lifestyle-only Dommes I know, none of them would be really interested in this guy. I'm sure he has no idea what he's doing wrong. I also bet that he COULD be trained, with time, to at least be a passable sub.

I've said repeatedly that one of my goals in the fetish is to help people find partners when possible. I stick by that. To that end, I'm going to post a series of blog entries on my opinion of how to attract a hypnoDomme.

It should be emphasized that these posts are my opinion, and I welcome polite comments, additions, and dissent! Some things which I view as critical are far less important to others. Nevertheless, there are certain patterns which do tend to obstruct people in finding partners. I want to address these.

It should also be said that while some of these tips and recommendations will apply also to finding male Doms, others will not.

I write from the cis woman perspective. I especially welcome feedback by trans women.

We'll start with tomorrow's post: The First Impression.

Back Home Safely...

...and taking calls again! Look for me on the next few days and nights. I can't wait to get back to hypnotizing people!

This week I'll also be recording the NEEHU podcast, updating the list of hypnosis events, clearing out spam comments from the podcast page, and updating the website. And, with any luck, I'll have news on new recordings... just in time for USian Thanksgiving! :)

And I'm going to be doing my first professional photo shoot soon, so there will be more pics up...

Happy Samhain! Plus NaBloPoMo

NaBloPoMo is a thing rather like NaNoWriMo, and I'm doing it this month. Unlike NaNoWriMo, which is one month of the year and has no content restrictions, NaBloPoMo does not admit adult sites or commercial sites.

Tough. I'm doing it anyway. :) I'm just not going to link up to the main site. I could use the traffic, but screw 'em. :) I have a feeling that people will either read or not. I am not sure if I'm going to attempt NaNoWriMo or just knit like a banshee to finish my holiday gifts for my family, though!

On to more important things!

This weekend, I have the immense joy of traveling with Jukebox to the east coast to attend the wedding of Wiseguy and DaniFantom. Theirs is a genuine, dynamic erotic hypnosis love story. I will be unavailable for calls Friday until Monday afternoon as a result.

Wiseguy has been a true friend for a decade. (Gods, has it been THAT LONG??) His stories are incredible - his "Busman's Holiday" is often cited as a primer for budding erotic hypnotists. I am so very honored and delighted to be invited to celebrate with him and with Dani. Yes, I will be posting from the road... even if the post is as short as "I always cry at weddings" or some such. ;)

I'm taking calls today and tonight, by the way... look for me!